Month: June 2015

Our Twins: We Were Excited and Scared

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When Stephen and Jun decided they were ready to start their family, they were both excited and anxious.

While anxiety is common for couples undergoing ART treatment, same-sex couples face the additional anxiety of coordinating both an egg donor and gestational surrogate.

They took their time assembling the right team to build their family, knowing they wanted twins–a boy and a girl. Using an agency, they found a mixed race egg donor who matched the mix between Stephen and Jun, who was born in the Philippines.

They also wanted a surrogate who was willing to carry twins, had children of her own, and had no concerns about carrying babies for a same-sex couple. The surrogate they found was both a twin and in a same-sex relationship.

“She had all right qualifications, and we felt immediately comfortable when we met her,” Stephen said.

The agency also referred them to several clinics, and the couple ultimately chose HRC and Dr. Frederick for a few reasons: Dr. Frederick had helped other same-sex couples conceive and she’d invested in the Bonding Room at Saddleback Memorial Medical Center for couples whose children are born via surrogate at the hospital.

Because Stephen and Jun knew they wanted both a boy and a girl, they opted for gender selection, which determines the sex of the embryos before transferring them to the surrogate. They were fortunate enough to have several embryos and one of each gender, so they chose to transfer one of each.

Dr. Frederick told them there was an 80 percent chance that one embryo would take, and a 50 percent chance that the second embryo would implant. When both were successfully implanted, the couple and Dr. Frederick were thrilled.

When at first you succeed, you must try again is this couple’s motto. The couple has already gotten a thumbs up from the donor and surrogate about a second round. In the next few years, their family of four might be a family of six–a though that excites Stephen and Jun…and probably scares them, too!

 

Finding the Right Fertility Clinic

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L. and A. didn’t start their fertility journey at HRC. In fact, initially they didn’t know that HRC even existed.

“We started with a clinic that seemed more like a baby mill,” L. explained. “It seemed like there were many unnecessary tests, and no one shared much of information with us. We’re pretty well-educated, so it wasn’t like we didn’t understand the medical terminology. But it was like pulling teeth to get information out of anyone. It seemed like all the clinic wanted was our money.”

The couple knew it was time to find another clinic, and their search led them to HRC and Dr. Robert Boostanfar. Once they became patients, they felt much more informed–even when the news wasn’t good. For example, they chose to quite halfway through their first cycle because L’s ovaries weren’t preparing enough eggs.

“It was disappointing because we saw signs of multiple follicles stimulated,” recalled L. “But then we started the drug regimen and I had fewer eggs. It was disappointing, even heartbreaking.”

But they didn’t give up, and two months later started a second IVF cycle that produced seven eggs and three viable embryos. Deciding how many embryos to transfer was difficult given the pros and cons to transferring too many or too few embryos. The important thing was that Dr. Boostanfar carefully mapped out the possibilities–including the best and worst case scenarios–which allowed them to make an informed decision.

“We were very happy with HRC and Dr. Boostanfar, and we ended up with the best case scenario–our beautiful twins.”